Whittled Words – Luc Bat Poem
Welcome to the weekly series, Whittled Words. A series highlighting the innumerable types and styles of poetry to challenge any creative wordsmith. This week’s selection:
LUC BAT POEM
The Luc Bat is a Vietnamese poetic form that means “six-eight.” In fact, the poem consists of alternating lines of six and eight syllables. This poem is interesting in its rhyme scheme that renews at the end of every eight-syllable line and rhymes on the sixth syllable of both lines.
Here is a diagram of the rhyme scheme and line lengths:
xxxxxA
xxxxxAxB
xxxxxB
xxxxxBxC
xxxxxC
xxxxxCxD
xxxxxD
xxxxxDxE
And so on. Luc bat poems have no set length or subject matter, and some run on for thousands of lines.
Examples of Luc Bat Poems:
MEASURE
by R J Clarken
I heard a note…then more.
It soon became a score. It rose
and grew. Would one suppose
those notes are just for those who hear
that magic flute? Unclear.
But still…I know when ‘ere it’s played
I’d march in its parade:
its song can never fade. A note…
TO OUR ROYAL LOVE
By J. Lynn Sheridan
What love is this that night
delays our secret flight into
lost passion? I’ll hold you
until sorrows are few and faint,
until tears of joy paint
chains of hearts into quaint embrace.
Then, with sigh and pearled lace,
we’ll soar high upon love’s grace toward
ancient dreams. Over fjord
and vale to claim reward—a song
of gold, a ring of strong
desire where we belong as one.
JACK MEETS LOKI
By Taylor Graham
Look at him, pup who lived
in a crate, his life sieved through wire.
What does a dog desire
but to let the bright fire of sun,
wind, earth stir him, to run
to the horizon? One new friend
to lead, to tug the end
of leash, to make it bend; to fly.
The two of them dash by
so happy under sky, alive.
THE SMALLEST SPARK
By Brad Osborne
Even the smallest spark
Is all you need to start the fire
The burning of desire
A rampant, raging pyre for one
And in the ashes won
An eternal flame undone by
Any self-serving lie
Or wretched alibi, false heart
That tears the fire apart
And bids the love to start to die
I hope you have enjoyed this entry to the series, Whittled Words. I look forward to your comments, and if you dare, maybe share your own Luc Bat poem. Thanks for reading!
This looks tricky to achieve. Well done.
Thank you! It does require a little work to meet such stringent requirements.
nice ones! I especially enjoyed jack meets loki, and your potential for sadness poem, the smallest spark.
Thank you, Beth! I love sharing the poems of others and always appreciate your support and readership!
Ah, tricky form with the rhyme and syllabic meter, but a nice challenge. The examples are well written
It was a tricky form for sure. But once you get started it begins to flow on its own. Thanks, Matt!
I may have written a few lines but I don’t think it does. But the trickier, the better.
an interesting rhyming scheme – looks a bit challenging. But once again you pulled it off and have created a poem that highlights it doesn’t take much to spark love or much to put out that love…
Thank you, Jim! I do love the challenge of writing this series. And I appreciate all your support!
and I enjoy reading them!
Very nice Brad. Something new to me. Thank you. I love your example, “The burning of desire
A rampant, raging pyre for one
And in the ashes won
An eternal flame undone by
Any self-serving lie,” powerful but gorgeous lines. Hope you have an awesome weekend. With love from Jonikins ❤️💕
Thank you, dearest Jonikins! ❤💕❤ I hope you have a wonderful weekend, as well!
Thanks Brad. I hope things are easing up where you are. They have a bit here but it is a different world, change just like in your poem. I hope you are able to be out and about a little bit anyway Brad. Sending you flowers. 🌺🌸💐🌺 hugs Jonikins
The nice weather finds me on the motorcycle just about every day. That, and an occasional meal I don’t have to cook, is all I really need. Sending kisses back! 😘💋😘❤
Oh well that sounds nice Brad. We walk and also occasionally get a meal out. Sounds like we are not to different. By the way I really want to applaud you for learning so many different types of poetry and them mastering them. Have an amazing day. Love to you and your as well. Jonikins
I question my mastery of anything, but I do enjoy learning and trying new forms. Thanks for all the praise and love! ❣
My pleasure my good friend. Love 💕 Joni
Masterful Brad! Great poem, difficult technique but the results, well I like them! All the best my friend,
Francisco
Thank you, my friend!
My pleasure Brad!
Really love “The Smallest Spark”. Well done. Thanks for “edumacating” me on poetic forms. ☺️
Happy to have you along for the ride!