Whittled Words – Luc Bat Poem

 

 

Welcome to the weekly series, Whittled Words. A series highlighting the innumerable types and styles of poetry to challenge any creative wordsmith. This week’s selection:

 

LUC BAT POEM

 

The Luc Bat is a Vietnamese poetic form that means “six-eight.” In fact, the poem consists of alternating lines of six and eight syllables. This poem is interesting in its rhyme scheme that renews at the end of every eight-syllable line and rhymes on the sixth syllable of both lines.

Here is a diagram of the rhyme scheme and line lengths:

xxxxxA
xxxxxAxB
xxxxxB
xxxxxBxC
xxxxxC
xxxxxCxD
xxxxxD
xxxxxDxE

And so on. Luc bat poems have no set length or subject matter, and some run on for thousands of lines.

 

 

Examples of Luc Bat Poems:

 

 

MEASURE

by R J Clarken

 

I heard a note…then more.
It soon became a score. It rose
and grew. Would one suppose
those notes are just for those who hear
that magic flute? Unclear.
But still…I know when ‘ere it’s played
I’d march in its parade:
its song can never fade. A note…

 

TO OUR ROYAL LOVE

By J. Lynn Sheridan

 

What love is this that night
delays our secret flight into
lost passion? I’ll hold you
until sorrows are few and faint,
until tears of joy paint
chains of hearts into quaint embrace.
Then, with sigh and pearled lace,
we’ll soar high upon love’s grace toward
ancient dreams. Over fjord
and vale to claim reward—a song
of gold, a ring of strong
desire where we belong as one.

 

JACK MEETS LOKI

By Taylor Graham

 

Look at him, pup who lived
in a crate, his life sieved through wire.
What does a dog desire
but to let the bright fire of sun,
wind, earth stir him, to run
to the horizon? One new friend
to lead, to tug the end
of leash, to make it bend; to fly.
The two of them dash by
so happy under sky, alive.

 

THE SMALLEST SPARK

By Brad Osborne

Even the smallest spark

Is all you need to start the fire

The burning of desire

A rampant, raging pyre for one

And in the ashes won

An eternal flame undone by

Any self-serving lie

Or wretched alibi, false heart

That tears the fire apart

And bids the love to start to die

 

 

 

 

I hope you have enjoyed this entry to the series, Whittled Words. I look forward to your comments, and if you dare, maybe share your own Luc Bat poem. Thanks for reading!

 

 

 

Comments
22 Responses to “Whittled Words – Luc Bat Poem”
  1. JustBeingMe says:

    This looks tricky to achieve. Well done.

  2. beth says:

    nice ones! I especially enjoyed jack meets loki, and your potential for sadness poem, the smallest spark.

  3. Matt P says:

    Ah, tricky form with the rhyme and syllabic meter, but a nice challenge. The examples are well written

  4. Jim Borden says:

    an interesting rhyming scheme – looks a bit challenging. But once again you pulled it off and have created a poem that highlights it doesn’t take much to spark love or much to put out that love…

  5. jonicaggiano says:

    Very nice Brad. Something new to me. Thank you. I love your example, “The burning of desire
    A rampant, raging pyre for one
    And in the ashes won
    An eternal flame undone by
    Any self-serving lie,” powerful but gorgeous lines. Hope you have an awesome weekend. With love from Jonikins ❤️💕

    • Brad Osborne says:

      Thank you, dearest Jonikins! ❤💕❤ I hope you have a wonderful weekend, as well!

      • jonicaggiano says:

        Thanks Brad. I hope things are easing up where you are. They have a bit here but it is a different world, change just like in your poem. I hope you are able to be out and about a little bit anyway Brad. Sending you flowers. 🌺🌸💐🌺 hugs Jonikins

      • Brad Osborne says:

        The nice weather finds me on the motorcycle just about every day. That, and an occasional meal I don’t have to cook, is all I really need. Sending kisses back! 😘💋😘❤

      • jonicaggiano says:

        Oh well that sounds nice Brad. We walk and also occasionally get a meal out. Sounds like we are not to different. By the way I really want to applaud you for learning so many different types of poetry and them mastering them. Have an amazing day. Love to you and your as well. Jonikins

      • Brad Osborne says:

        I question my mastery of anything, but I do enjoy learning and trying new forms. Thanks for all the praise and love! ❣

      • jonicaggiano says:

        My pleasure my good friend. Love 💕 Joni

  6. Francisco Bravo Cabrera says:

    Masterful Brad! Great poem, difficult technique but the results, well I like them! All the best my friend,
    Francisco

  7. sudrakarma says:

    Really love “The Smallest Spark”. Well done. Thanks for “edumacating” me on poetic forms. ☺️

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

%d bloggers like this: